The Wall

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“What a dear old wall that is that runs along by the river there! I never pass it without feeling better for the sight of it. Such a mellow, bright, sweet old wall; what a charming picture it would make, with the lichen creeping here, and the moss growing there, a shy young vine peeping over the top at this spot, to see what is going on upon the busy river, and the sober old ivy clustering a little farther down! There are fifty shades and tints and hues in every ten yards of that old wall. . . . It looks so peaceful and so quiet, and it is such a dear old place to ramble round in the early morning before many people are about.” Jerome K. Jerome, “Three Men In A Boat (To Say Nothing of the Dog)” Ch. 6 (1889)

Top 7 Signs Your Pastor Needs a Vacation

7. His first words to the congregation on Sunday morning are "All right, listen up you heathens..."

6. He falls asleep during his own sermon.

5. He shows up for Sunday service wearing Bermuda Shorts and a Tank Top.

4. Every time his pager goes off, he shouts, "Why can't they just leave me alone?!"

3. Announces baptismal services will be at the Grand Canyon.

2. You go to his office for counseling and pour your heart out to him and he says, "Sounds like a personal problem to me."

1. For the past two months he has preached the same sermon every Sunday.

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