Head-dibs

“You have sent a letter to me through the hand of a ‘friend’ of yours, as you call him. And in your very next sentence you warn me not to discuss with him all the matters that concern you, saying that even you yourself are not accustomed to do this; in other words, you have in the same letter affirmed and denied that he is your friend. Now if you used this word of ours in the popular sense, and called him ‘friend’ in the same way in which we speak of all candidates for election as ‘honourable gentlemen,’ and as we greet all men whom we meet casually, if their names slip us for the moment, with the salutation ‘my dear sir,’ – so be it. But if you consider any man a friend whom you do not trust as you trust yourself, you are mightily mistaken and you do not sufficiently understand what true friendship means.” (Seneca, Letter 3, “On True and False Friendship”)

“It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor. What does it matter how much a man has laid up in his safe, or in his warehouse, how large are his flocks and how fat his dividends, if he covets his neighbour's property, and reckons, not his past gains, but his hopes of gains to come? Do you ask what is the proper limit to wealth? It is, first, to have what is necessary, and, second, to have what is enough.”  (Moral Letters 2, “On Discursiveness In Reading”)

 

“. . . that certain moments are torn from us, that some are gently removed, and that others glide beyond our reach. The most disgraceful kind of loss, however, is that due to carelessness. Furthermore, if you will pay close heed to the problem, you will find that the largest portion of our life passes while we are doing ill, a goodly share while we are doing nothing, and the whole while we are doing that which is not to the purpose. . . . Lay hold of to-day's task, and you will not need to depend so much upon to-morrow’s.” (Seneca, On Saving Time)  

Have you ever noticed that you feel compelled to do something when you hear or read a good story? You can’t quite put your finger on it but there is this knowledge that you want to take some kind of action, like be a better person. Sure, we like to read or listen to something for entertainment, but what remains when we are finished? Warm fuzzies that ultimately dissipate and get lost in the shuffle of the day. It’s nearly impossible to recall that feeling once it’s gone. But there are some elements we encounter that leave a lasting impression because we are impelled take some kind of action. Remember those tomes of literature we used in high school and college. Did you ever notice how many discussions were had over those stories? If you still have one, crack it open and notice the questions at the end of each contribution. How many imparted some kind of moral lesson or set an example to be followed? Perhaps you did not notice your conscience responding to what you read or heard yet you...

"While I was thus mutely pondering within myself, and recording my sorrowful complainings with my pen, it seemed to me that there appeared above my head a woman of a countenance exceeding venerable.  Her eyes were bright as fire, and of a more than human keenness; her complexion was lively, her vigour showed no trace of enfeeblement; and yet her years were right full, and she plainly seemed not of our age and time. Her stature was difficult to judge. At one moment it exceeded not the common height, at another her forehead seemed to strike the sky; and whenever she raised her head higher, she began to pierce within the very heavens, and to baffle the eyes of them that looked upon her.  Her garments were of an imperishable fabric, wrought with the finest threads and of the most delicate workmanship; and these, as her own lips afterwards assured me, she had herself woven with her own hands. The beauty of this vesture had been somewhat tarnished by age and neglect, and wore that d...

“Anything that’s human is mentionable, and anything that is mentionable can be more manageable. When we can talk about our feelings, they become less overwhelming, less upsetting, and less scary. The people we trust with that important talk can help us know that we are not alone.” ― Fred Rogers

One reason I find Stoicism so captivating is because they don't waste time with deep or wandering explanations. Stoic philosophy is put forth in "fortune cookie" sayings--short and to the point. Emperor and Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius wrote this note to himself in his journal.  “Today I escaped anxiety. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions—not outside.” Take whatever it is that troubles you and put in in the blank. Stress, fear, intimidation, hate . . .  “Today I escaped ________. Or no, I discarded it, because it was within me, in my own perceptions—not outside.” Interesting how that works, eh?

"A good isn’t increased by the addition of time, but if one is wise for even a moment, they will be no less happy than the person who exercises virtue for all time and happily passes their life in it." —Chrysippus Quoted By Plutarch In Moralia: “Against The Stoics On Common Conceptions,” 1062 (LOEB, P.682) Perhaps wisdom and happiness are like winning a medal in the Olympics. It doesn’t matter whether you won a hundred years ago or ten minutes ago, or whether you won just once or in multiple events. It doesn’t matter whether someone beats your time or score down the road, and it doesn’t matter whether you never compete again. You’ll always be a medalist, and you’ll always know what it feels like. No one can take that away—and it would be impossible to feel more of that feeling. The Juilliard-trained actor Even Handler, who not only survived acute myeloid leukemia but also severe depression, has talked about his decision to take antidepressants, which he did for a deliber...

"Whosoever embraces necessity count as wise, skilled in divine matters."  --Euripedes, quoted by Epictetus, Enchiridion , 53

1797 to 1828 was all he had. Franz Schubert died young. A student of Antonio Salieri, Schubert became obsessed with music at a young age. Days were long doing little but composing. When he started teaching piano, he was known to stop composing music only to discipline a student who interrupted him. A typical romantic-bohemian, borrowing money, living in other people's homes, he sold his music cheap and spent any earnings drinking and reciting poetry with friends who loved and performed his music ("Schubertians"). Schubert's Symphony No. 8 is known as his "Unvollendete" (Unfinished), as he started the piece in 1822 and only completed the first two movements. As a joke, young music students penned lyrics to the melody found in the cello and echoed by the violins after the first minute or so, "This is the symphony that Schubert wrote but didn't finish;  this is the symphony that Schubert wrote but didn't finish,  th' unfinished symphon...

“ Let us therefore set out wholeheartedly, leaving aside our many distractions and exert ourselves in this single purpose, before we realize too late the swift and unstoppable flight of time and are left behind. As each day arises, welcome it as the very best day of all, and make it your own possession. We must seize what flees. ”   (--Seneca, Moral Letters, 108) Make life extraordinary.

It's an old word, "affectation." We would say simply, "fake." Designed to impress. Don't put up a false front in what you do, what you say, even how you say it. You were created a certain way to fulfill a specific purpose. Your purpose is not to be artificial. Posing gets you nowhere. Don't try to be brilliant because you really don't know. Don't try to be popular because you are not. Don't try to be magnetic or impose yourself on others. No two people are alike so there is no need to be like someone else. There is something better, with that in mind. God never intended us to be someone else. " . . . the first and greatest task of the philosopher is to test and separate appearances, and to act on nothing that is untested." (Epictetus)

Withhold. Impose forbearance. Refrain. You don't have to. Want to test your will-power? Deny yourself something meaningful. Ceasing the small stuff is easy. Holding off something precious can be painful. Abstinence does not mean to quit, as in changing habits, but abstinence might lead to it. Abstinence can be a useful tool. It can be a way to prepare for hardship, in parting with something comfortable for a while. Try missing a meal. Or two meals. Or a whole day's worth of meals. Try taking a cold shower, or going out in the cold without a coat. Other people do it. Daily. So now you have to ask yourself: what do those people have that I do not? This is what abstinence will reveal.

"Why, then, should you reject Philosophy as a comrade?  Even the rich man copies her ways when he is in his senses. If you wish to have leisure for your mind, either be a poor man, or resemble a poor man. Study cannot be helpful unless you take pains to live simply; and living simply is voluntary poverty. Away, then, with all excuses like: 'I have not yet enough; when I have gained the desired amount, then I shall devote myself wholly to philosophy.' And yet this ideal, which you are putting off and placing second to other interests, should be secured first of all; you should begin with it. You retort: 'I wish to acquire something to live on.' Yes, but learn while you are acquiring it; for if anything forbids you to live nobly, nothing forbids you to die nobly.  There is no reason why poverty should call us away from philosophy, – no, nor even actual want. For when hastening after wisdom, we must endure even hunger. Men have endured hunger when their towns ...

"Philosophy is no trick to catch the public; it is not devised for show. It is a matter, not of words, but of facts. It is not pursued in order that the day may yield some amusement before it is spent, or that our leisure may be relieved of a tedium that irks us. It moulds and constructs the soul; it orders our life, guides our conduct, shows us what we should do and what we should leave undone; it sits at the helm and directs our course as we waver amid uncertainties. Without it, no one can live fearlessly or in peace of mind. Countless things that happen every hour call for advice; and such advice is to be sought in philosophy." (Seneca)