Head-dibs

“You have sent a letter to me through the hand of a ‘friend’ of yours, as you call him. And in your very next sentence you warn me not to discuss with him all the matters that concern you, saying that even you yourself are not accustomed to do this; in other words, you have in the same letter affirmed and denied that he is your friend. Now if you used this word of ours in the popular sense, and called him ‘friend’ in the same way in which we speak of all candidates for election as ‘honourable gentlemen,’ and as we greet all men whom we meet casually, if their names slip us for the moment, with the salutation ‘my dear sir,’ – so be it. But if you consider any man a friend whom you do not trust as you trust yourself, you are mightily mistaken and you do not sufficiently understand what true friendship means.” (Seneca, Letter 3, “On True and False Friendship”)

“It is not the man who has too little, but the man who craves more, that is poor. What does it matter how much a man has laid up in his safe, or in his warehouse, how large are his flocks and how fat his dividends, if he covets his neighbour's property, and reckons, not his past gains, but his hopes of gains to come? Do you ask what is the proper limit to wealth? It is, first, to have what is necessary, and, second, to have what is enough.”  (Moral Letters 2, “On Discursiveness In Reading”)

 

“. . . that certain moments are torn from us, that some are gently removed, and that others glide beyond our reach. The most disgraceful kind of loss, however, is that due to carelessness. Furthermore, if you will pay close heed to the problem, you will find that the largest portion of our life passes while we are doing ill, a goodly share while we are doing nothing, and the whole while we are doing that which is not to the purpose. . . . Lay hold of to-day's task, and you will not need to depend so much upon to-morrow’s.” (Seneca, On Saving Time)  

Seneca asked, “How does it help to make misfortune heavier by complaining about it?” Another way to ask this would be, “Did complaining help? Then stop. If not, then stop.” I manage a staff of mostly young adults who are like sponges as they listen to elder employees complain and complain and complain. I confess, there are times when I complain as well, but then I am aware of who is listening. One older fellow always has something to say, dropping his comments like little bombs then walks away thinking all his words are going to change anything. But then he only walks away because I’ve asked him, “did all that help? No? Then you can stop now.” Complaining does nothing but reveal who a person really is, and for the most part, complaints merely mean there has been a disruption to one’s comfort zone, that something is beyond their control or that the person feels entitled and is not getting their way. Ever notice how most complaining at a restaurant is committed before eating? People are ...

"Whom the rising sun hath seen high in pride,  him the setting sun hath seen laid low.  Let none be over-confident when fortune smiles;  let none despair of better things when fortune fails.  Clotho blends weal and woe, lets no lot stand,  keeps ever fate a-turning.  No one has found the gods so kind that he may promise to-morrow to himself.  God keeps all mortal things in swift whirl turning." (Seneca, Thyestes )

"One way to read The Odyssey is that it’s a story of human perseverance. Odysseus is cunning and determined, he’s willing to do everything and anything to get back to Ithaca...and eventually, because of that, he finally does. That’s certainly the interpretation of Tennyson in his poem 'Ulysses ': 'We are not now that strength which in old days Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are; One equal temper of heroic hearts, Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.' But there is also a way to read The Odyssey as illustrating the exact opposite lesson. Because basically every delay and impediment on Odysseus’s long journey home is completely his fault. He says he wants to get back to Ithaca, and then proceeds to constantly undermine himself. It’s only towards the end when he finally stops and actually listens to the gods (most of whom favor him) that he quickly makes any real progress. In f...

"Want to" vs. "Have to"

"The founder of the universe, who assigned to us the laws of life, provided that we should live well, but not in luxury. Everything needed for our well-being is right before us, whereas what luxury requires is gathered by many miseries and anxieties. Let us use this gift of nature and count it among the greatest things." (Seneca, Moral Letters, 119.15b)

“Heraclitus would shed tears whenever he went out in public, Democritus laughed. One saw the whole as a parade of miseries, the other of follies. And so, we should take a lighter view of things and bear them with an easy spirit, for it is more human to laugh at life than to lament it.” (Seneca, On Tranquility of Mind, 15.2)

“Now that I’ve suffered shipwreck, I’m on a good journey . . . You’ve done well, Fortune, driving me thus to philosophy” (Zeno)

"I'll never be ashamed to quote a bad writer with a good saying."   (Seneca, On Tranquility of Mind, 11.8)

"Therefore, explain why a wise person shouldn’t get drunk—not with words, but by the facts of its ugliness and offensiveness. It’s most easy to prove that so-called pleasures when they go beyond proper measure, are but punishments." (Seneca, Moral Letters, 83.27) Is there a less effective technique to persuading people to do something than haranguing them? Is there anything that turns people off more than abstract notions? That’s why the Stoics don’t say, “Stop doing this, it’s a sin.” Instead they say, “Don’t do this because it will make you miserable.” They don’t say, “Pleasure isn’t pleasurable.” They say, “Endless pleasure becomes its own form of punishment.” Their methods of persuasion hew the line in The 48 Laws of Power: “Appeal to People’s Self-Interest Never to Their Mercy or Gratitude.” If you find yourself trying to persuade someone to change or do something differently, remember what an effective lever self-interest is. It’s not that this or that is bad, it’s ...

“It’s ruinous for the soul to be anxious about the future and miserable in advance of misery, engulfed by anxiety that the things it desires might remain it’s own until the very end. For such a soul will never be at rest— by longing for things to come it will lose the ability to enjoy present things.” —  (Seneca, Moral Letters, 98.5)

"Apply yourself to thinking through difficulties--hard times can be softened, tight squeezes widened, and heavy loads made lighter for those who can apply the right pressure." (Seneca, On Tranquility Of Mind , 10.4b)

Not all things need to be said and sometimes we learn that lesson by saying stupid things. "The inexperienced and fearful talk to reassure themselves. The ability to listen, to deliberately keep out of a conversation and subsist without its validity is rare." (Ryan Holiday)

"This is why we say that nothing happens to the wise person contrary to their expectations." (Seneca, Tranquility of Mind , 13.3) 1. Manage your expectations 2. Consider for the best and worst-case scenarios. 3. Be prepared for either and excel in virtue as you receive it.

"It is not good to be entirely without the experience of cold and heat, but one ought in some degree to feel the cold in winter and likewise the heat in summer and to seek shade as little as possible." (Musonius Rufus, Lecture 19) "We should take wandering outdoor walks, so that the mind might be nourished and refreshed by the open air and deep breathing." (Seneca, Tranquility of Mind , 17.8)

"Work nourishes noble minds."  (Seneca, Moral Letters, 31.5) God worked six days then rested, but not because He ran out of energy or grew tired. God is always at work. God rested to show us that work is good and rest is good. Rest is not a requirement, but you need it. God blessed one day out of seven for rest, a time to separate from "the grind" and reconnect with ourselves, with others, and with Him.  Man does not live by rest alone, for you get restless, bored, doughy, irritable, claustrophobic, frustrated. This is not how you are meant to live. Be refreshed with rest, but be fed, nurture and grow with work. Contribute to the world in which you live and feel better by it.