The Tardy Cherub

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Cupid snoozed—his alarm betrayed, Wings askew, his bow mislaid. Love showed up a moment late, Blushing, breathless, tempting fate. Turns out hearts still fell just fine— Even tardy arrows hit on time.

The Philosophy of Umpires

Three umpires were debating their philosophies of umpiring. "There's balls and there's strikes," says the first, "and I call 'em the way they are."

"No!" exclaimed the next. "That's arrogant! There's balls and there's strikes, and I call 'em the way I see 'em."

"That's no better," broke in the third. "Why beat around the bush? Why not be realistic about what we do? There's balls and there's strikes, and they ain't nothin' 'till I call 'em."

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