Bad Cold by Shel Silverstein

  This cold is too much for my shortsleeve. Go get me a Kleenex--and fast. I sniffle and wheeze And I'm ready to sneeze And I don't know how long I can last.... Atchoo--it's to wet for a kleenex, So bring me handkerchief, quick. It's--atchoo--no joke, Now the handkerchief's soaked. Hey, a dish towel just might do the trick. Atchoo--it's too much for bath towel. There never has been such a cold. I'll be better off With that big tablecloth, No--bring me the flag off the pole. Atchoo--bring the clothes from the closet, Atchaa--get the sheets from the bed, The drapes off the window, The rugs off the floor To soak up this cold in my head. Atchoo-- hurry down to the circus And ask if they'll lend you the tent. You say they said yes? Here it comes--Lord be blessed-- Here it is--Ah-kachoooo--there it went.

Recent Books by Theological Liberals

“The Errancy of Inerrancy”

“New Bible Deconstructionary”

“Quarrel Majority: Schismatic Evangelicals and the Schismatic Movement”

“The ‘God is Dead’ Movement Is Alive”

“Unitarianism: A Religion for Atheists With Children”

“Declaring War On Complementerrorism”

“The Low-Down on Higher Criticism:

“Critical Mass: The World Has Enough Catholics Already”

“For I Don’t Know The Plans I Have For You: The Openness of God”

“Relativism Is Always True”

  • (ht: BN and “Off The Record”, Wheaton College, Vol 1, No 1, 2005)

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