The Kiss

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  “Ryabovitch pulled the bed-clothes over his head, curled himself up in bed, and tried to gather together the floating images in his mind and to combine them into one whole. But nothing came of it. He soon fell asleep, and his last thought was that someone had caressed him and made him happy—that something extraordinary, foolish, but joyful and delightful, had come into his life. The thought did not leave him even in his sleep. When he woke up the sensations of oil on his neck and the chill of peppermint about his lips had gone, but joy flooded his heart just as the day before.” The Kiss By Anton Chekhov (1860–1904)

Stupid Bike

It is those moments of sheer stupidity (perhaps the better word would simply be “thoughtlessness”) that reminds us that we are not gods.

I have been trying to get the upper hand on my “corporalita” (specifically, physical health and fitness) by finding a routine at the gym (it’s been more than 25 years since I’ve made regular appearances, so I’m starting all over again). The other day, I made my appearance with every intention of walking on the treadmill. As they were all taken, I sat on a recumbent bike, to wait until a treadmill was open. Like the treadmill, the bike as much potential for a workout, so I thought I would try something different, so I confronted the bike.

As many already know, the treadmill is programmed to provide the user a number of pre-set options to take one through one workout or another; or, the user may manually program his or her own. I use the “Forest Walk” preset (at present, a 40 minute walk, speed 3.0 at 1.0 unit of incline). The computer panel blinks at me with its video game screen even before I step up. “Walk on me and win a prize!”

The panel on the bike was dead. Blank. No lights and no other signs of life. I checked the rear of the bike—perhaps it was unplugged or something. No cords to be seen.

Perhaps it is battery-powered . . .

I checked the next bike: dead.

The next bike: dead.

No bikes today. Oh well.

I waited for the treadmill.

One soon became available and as I stepped up I expressed within my gratitude for my turn that I would have used the bikes, but there did not seem to be working.

“Sure, they work,” the sweaty guy huffed back. “The user generates the power.”

I decided then and there that the little guy on the bike inside my head must have been taking a water break.
Yeah, I'm going back today.

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