Wakefield

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  “In some old magazine or newspaper I recollect a story, told as truth, of a man—let us call him Wakefield—who absented himself for a long time from his wife. The fact, thus abstractedly stated, is not very uncommon, nor, without a proper distinction of circumstances, to be condemned either as naughty or nonsensical. Howbeit, this, though far from the most aggravated, is perhaps the strangest instance on record of marital delinquency, and, moreover, as remarkable a freak as may be found in the whole list of human oddities. The wedded couple lived in London. The man, under pretense of going a journey, took lodgings in the next street to his own house, and there, unheard of by his wife or friends and without the shadow of a reason for such self-banishment, dwelt upward of twenty years. During that period he beheld his home every day, and frequently the forlorn Mrs. Wakefield. And after so great a gap in his matrimonial felicity—when his death was reckoned certain, his estate settled...

You Don't Have One


“We have the power to hold no opinion about a thing and to not let it upset our state of mind – for things have no natural power to shape our judgments.” (Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, 6.52)

Think for a moment about everything you don't know. 
Go ahead. I'll wait. 

What is your opinion about those things you don't know? How do you feel? 
You don't have an opinion because you don't know what you don't know--right? 

Ok, think for a moment about something that might upset you. Can you name it? Say what it is? 
  • Did someone say something behind your back? 
    • What did they say? 
    • Did you hear it? 
    • Do you even know for a fact that anyone said anything about you at all? 
    • Was it derogatory or nice? 
    • Still don't know? Then why upset? 
So why get upset about something we know nothing about? 
  • That guy that cut you off on the way to work this morning--why did he do it? 
    • To be rude because he saw YOU coming down the road and thought you needed a driving lesson? (That's selfish)
    • He woke up late and is still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes?
    • He was simply not paying attention? 
    • He had a bad night over a sick kid or a family fight and is not paying attention? 
    • He's hung over? 
    • His opinion was there was enough room to pull out? 
    • Still don't know? Then why upset? 
Here's another way to look at it: 
  • if something does not exist, what power does it have for one to create an opinion about it? 
  • if something is irrelevant, why does it bother us? 
Waste no more time and/or energy on things that don't matter.