The Island-Fish

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  “O ye passengers, whom may God preserve! come up quickly in to the ship, hasten to embark, and leave your merchandise, and flee with your lives, and save yourselves from destruction; for this apparent island, upon which ye are, is not really an island, but it is a great fish that hath become stationary in the midst of the sea, and the sand hath accumulated upon it, so that it hath become like an island, and trees have grown upon it since times of old; and when ye lighted the fire upon it, the fish felt the heat, and put itself in motion, and now it will descend with you into the sea, and ye will all be drowned: then seek for yourselves escape before destruction, and leave the merchandise.—The passengers, therefore, hearing the words of the master of the ship, hastened to go up into the vessel, leaving the merchandise, and their other goods, and their copper cooking-pots, and their fire-pots; and some reached the ship, and others reached it not. The island had moved, and descended...

Enchiridion 15: Life As A Dinner Party

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"Remember that you must behave in life as at a dinner party. Is anything brought around to you? Put out your hand and take your share with moderation. Does it pass by you? Don't stop it. Is it not yet come? Don't stretch your desire towards it, but wait till it reaches you. Do this with regard to children, to a wife, to public posts, to riches, and you will eventually be a worthy partner of the feasts of the gods. And if you don't even take the things which are set before you, but are able even to reject them, then you will not only be a partner at the feasts of the gods, but also of their empire. For, by doing this, Diogenes, Heraclitus and others like them, deservedly became, and were called, divine." (Epictetus, Enchiridion 15)

Imagine a situation where protocol, manners are everything. Epictetus imagines a dinner party, where we are on our best behavior. When the food is passed, take with moderation. If it goes by, don't chase it. Wait your turn.

Do this with regard to life. That which makes up a life is "passed around." Some things will come to you, some will not. Some have the blessing of children, others don't. If you have children, that's your present blessing. If not, you have a future blessing of another kind. You may not understand what it is right now, but your day of blessing will come. Your blessing will be unique. The same is true with spouse, with your role in the community, with riches, anything. 

If an opportunity presents itself, consider to take it if it falls according to nature; but, don't "put the cart before the horse." Don't try to make something happen that won't. Or can't. Forcing something to happen will work against you. Things break that way. 

Besides, it's arrogant, inconsiderate, selfish. You have a choice to take or reject an opportunity. If it passes you might not get it again, so choose wisely as long as the choice remains in your control. 


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